30.09.25 I wish i was somewhere far from here, on a night like this. sitting on grass with a forest behind, sand a little further infront, and beyond that the forever sea crashing against the sky in the distant horizon. a breeze rustling the trees. a pretty sky, the sun dancing down, a little sliver letting out rays. clouds pink and golden, but the sky still dark, dark enough to see only the brightest of stars. and in the air a soft singing of strings, instruments, voices.

but too I would like to be far from here, on a night like this, with a swaying beneath my feet. wood creaking quietly and a gentle crash of waves. the sea just barely lit by rays from a sun just beneath the horizon, but a sky dark enough that few scattered stars twinkle. pretty colours of pink and gold. a breeze, a wind, salt air. a fluttering of sails in the background, singing voices, strumming of strings and other things. smiles and laughter and song, something peaceful. a calm rowdiness. there would be no gaping hole in my chest nor overbearing heaviness, because in the breeze, the freedom, the song, there is a home.
an idea of home i have created for myself, but one that must be true, that must be where my heart is. because tears wouldn't blur my vision as i whispered something similar to this to myself, looking out my window, fixated on one of the only stars i can see at such a time, in such a place as a city.
and i tend to wonder if what i say has merit. if i say this just because i am young. and i think i would like to go home now, but it doesn't exist yet